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SANGEETA WADDHWANI INVITES YOU TO A CITY THAT WALKS THE GLOBAL TALK, THROBBING WITH AN EVOLUTIONARY BEAT

I am posting this from Waterloo’s dim sum speciality restaurant…PING PONG. In front of me is the Southbank Centre which has rows of white pyramids covering its terrace. The supermarkets and restaurants here are packed with vegan options for everything…from beverages to prepared meals. Every other beverage place has organic juices as an option. And yesterday was dining at an Indian fine dining space called Cafe Spice where I was assured the chicken on my plate was NEVER subjected to cruelty in its farming or demise.

If that’s not a sign of a global society’s coming of age, there are many more. A gorgeous young man of Moroccan origin Sat on a table next to me at a Starbucks yesterday. I had no battery left on my phone and desperately needed to charge it. Lo…he had an android too and miraculously was using a C Pin cable to charge his phone. His charged quickly and he put mine in for charging.

While our soulmate gadgets were stirring back to life, we had a fascinating conversation. He felt London people were fundamentally global in spirit…that this city was a microcosm of the world. I couldn’t agree more. People had been absurdly nice to me as I kept asking for directions. One elderly lady even walked me to an Overground train which I was taking for the first time ever!

I had seen impeccable manners among the everyday passengers on buses and trains. People often thanked the bus driver before getting off. My host and cousin Monica sensitized me to not occupying the priority seats, to ensure pregnant women, the elderly and handicapped could sit on them.

To get back to the gorgeous Mahdi, he was promoting educational masterclasses featuring celebrities like Annie Leibowitz and other renowned actors, filmmakers etc online. “Initially I was earning a commission from what students were paying when they signed up. But my conscience wasn’t happy taking money from kids. So I stopped taking commissions.”

Mahdi mentioned that back home in Morocco his family dealt with pure bred horses and helped others to breed them. That he didn’t mind treating as his revenue model. But not education.

What followed with Mahdi was a deeply inspiring chat about London again. ” It is a spiritual city,” he smiled. “Only people at a certain frequency will find their way here.”

My host and her flatmate laughed at this later, as they knew the economics of living here only too well. But I continued to like the dreamy, idealistic voice of my beautiful stranger friend. “Although Morocco is beautiful, if I stay there too long I feel suffocated,” he shared. Interestingly he was echoing my own sentiments. I love Mumbai’s dynamism but rarely would one meet so many global citizens there. Unless one made it a point to attend all expat events.

Mahdi got a call from a damsel in distress…a Polish-Saudi girl born and raised in London whose family was not supporting a dynamic new destiny that “is unfolding” for her, as he explained.

When I rued how unconventional my journey had been, he lyrically said, “Yes people have certain dreams for their lives, but certain Dreams exist that have certain lives in them. You belong to a larger dream. You need to let go of safety…safety is a trap. There is much abundance in the Universe but you have to trust it and let it in.”

And after asking his damsel in distress to get ready and meet him, (he insisted she not dress up..simply put something on)…he excused himself and left…leaving behind precious food for thought. He had not even taken a sip of his coffee!

London Bridge is truly symbolic. It is a delicious passage to today’s evolving consciousness. May it never fall down. Am in love with this city… it has much to teach beyond the languages of utility and pragmatism which so dominate our minds in Asia today…

SANGEETA WADDHWANI SHOWCASES A WORK OF ART INSPIRED BY THE TOTAL IMMERSION OF MAN AND TECHNOLOGY

So one has seen how the digital universe has multiplied our connectivity. But it has also possibly taken away the beauty of the singular, in depth connect that past generations have known.

Relating through mostly WhatsApp texting has often mounted illusory filial ties for me. When a crisis hit me ..a double sprained ankle last monsoon…an aunt who every now and then professed to deeply love and care for me with unfailing regularity, and who lived a hop away, didn’t rush to take me to hospital because she had transportation problems. Possibly one of her two cars and drivers were not available. A friend who I called fetched me in a matter of 20 minutes and ensured I was looked after through the xrays etc.

WhatsApp relationships, YouTube videos, the neo-human impulse to document everything from human joys to tragedies because a camera empowers one to do so…And of course Twitter and Insta stardom…all this has changed us from Invisible to Visibles. From silent sentinels to life’s moments to active exaggerators of them.

Every technology has a spiritual underlying purpose. So does every profession. It’s what we do with our capability that can help the human race to evolve or sink deeper into the pursuit of wealth, physical pleasures, and more agents of Maya..the Hindu idea of illusion.

My latest painting, the MANDROID is a visual story at many levels. His eyes reflect his immersion in the mobile phone driven reality. Nonstop content flows through his every disconnected fragment,… mind and body. He feeds on data…And to make a clumsy pun, data is his Datta (Hindu word for GOD).

Does he need love? Tenderness? A hug? Not consciously. As long as the phone battery is charged, he is connected to so many at a time. But yes, unplug those eyes from his tightly held mobile and you will hear the silent scream of the MANDROID. Withdrawal. He can’t handle a non-interneted life. A simple two-dimensional world which demands that you pick up the phone to connect. In real time.

Technology allows editors to work in their home cities away from their offices and teams. It allows singers to record their part of a song recording and email it to a music producer. It allows a working mum…say a celebrity reality tv judge like Shilpa Shetty…to watch what her son is doing on her mobile phone via satellite camera set ups at home, while she is on a set..shooting.

Technology has liberated us spatially. But in our hearts of hearts, no matter how immersive the experiences we are offered, having that special someone hold your hand or whisper sweet nothings in your ear…those are the moments life leads you by it’s gentle hand. And creates memories where there would be but data.

WHEN DID THE SATI SAVITRIS OF INDIA BECOME VEERE DI VIXENS? SANGEETA WADDHWANI DARES TO ASK THE FORBIDDEN QUESTION…

Worlds apart from the wedding sagas of yore…the HUM AAPKE HAI KAUNS…HUM SAATH SAATH HAIN…VDW is a desi Sex and the City, filled with urban feminist rants, some credible funny and oops moments (like one of the ‘Veere’ girls getting a divorce because her husband walks in on her, flowers in hand, to find her cheating on him with a vibrator! See what I mean?

Yes not sure how the movie didn’t get mired in censorship debates about shattering illusions. Illusions that we love to have about ‘pure and vestal brides’ from the Balika Badu days to the Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam (remember Aishwarya’s demure romance with her house guest Salman? Which triggered a real-life two year live in relationship?)

Screen stories have always idealised love till this decade….but then it all fell to pieces when reality became so wonderfully muddy. Yes we had women of Rekha’s calibre being a harried housewife who sleeps with a married man in Aastha – but feels compelled to bolster her spending power for the sake of her child. The ‘paid for’ intimacy fills her with a sense of guilt and violation.

Our women in VDW…are happiest feeling no filial obligation and just being lovers (Kalindi or Kareena’s character)…another, an accomplished lawyer, sometimes finds herself waking up naked beside a stranger after a drunken decadent night…(Sonam’s character) ..And she doesn’t even want to give him her phone number! And so on.

How much of India’s reality will relate to this? Is it good to unleash a chick flick like this on those virile Bihari rapists and senior citizens who are allegedly losing the plot, raping an eight year old girl? I honestly don’t know.

I remember asking an Uber cab driver in Delhi about his views on the Nirbhaya incident. I was shocked to hear him say, ‘Uske saath ek boyfriend tha. Aisi ladki ko character naheen hai.” Hmmmm…I was dying to ask him if all the cheating married men around India can boast of character or if promiscuous gay men were asking to be raped. But being alone, and single, I chose to be silent. So this is such a reality check: his logic was, a girl with a boyfriend has no character!”

The second question begging to be asked is, how relateable were the Veere women to our urban women? I was watching a trial show filled with sophisticated South Mumbai ladies…And they were clearly having a blast! In fact, they most liked the straight-talking divorcee-to-be who was caught with her vibrator. And how she punctured all the murky gossip around her by speaking the truth to the hypocritical gossipy society women…alerting the same women to their own children’s addictions to cocaine and flings. Publicly!

Am imagining this film’s impact on fans of Bollywood around the world. Fans of Bollywood in conservative Canada, the US, HK, Pakistan. Amish Tripathi, the popular author of mythical tales retold through a modern feminist filter, once pointed out to me that pop culture in the West was leaning towards more spiritual concerns, and ecological concerns, while pop culture here was more about aspirational lifestyles…and imitating the West.

One can see that, in all the flash-your-cash scenarios…be it the fancy car in which Sonam’s one-night-stand boyfriend seeks to drop her home, or Kalindi’s in-laws facing police enquiries for over-spending at their son’s wedding.

If one had to conclude this review, the silver lining seems to be that our Veere girls DID show character. They were not gold-diggers. One ran away from her rich daddy to marry an American. Kalindi had chosen to leave her father (who always fought with her mother…a mother who passes away young)… and be self sufficient living in Australia. Kalindi has a public spat with her fiance when he places a diamond bigger than his original proposal ring on her finger. (His mother requests for the original ring to be returned and goes for a bigger one). And Sonam, a super successful divorce lawyer, dumps an arranged match when he can’t handle her making a move on him on the dance floor. “I want a wife, not a whore!” ..is his 18th century retort to her attempt to kiss him. See how confused we are?

We do live in interesting times!

Would love to hear comments from followers on this film!

IT’S BEAUTIFUL TO BE YOUNG, FEMALE AND AMBITIOUS…TILL IT KILLS. SANGEETA WADDHWANI PRESENTS A TRAGIC TALE OF A PAKISTANI BEAUTY WHO COULD HAVE GIVEN OUR BTOWN HOTTIES HAUTE COMPETITION

Ever heard of a stupendously popular social media star who came from a small village of Pakistan and who had a tumultuous rise to stardom mostly on the basis of her popular videos on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram?

She had blue eyes, ivory skin, would have made great fodder for Indian cinema. Today, its her story that could make a blockbuster. Somewhere between a DIRTY PICTURE AND A SECRET SUPERSTAR. Here’s how it unfolds. A girl who came from virtually nowhere…a village called Shah Sadar Din…. openly told her parents she wanted to be famous. She adopted the exotic name Qandeel Baloch…( her actual name was Fouzia Azeem) and she actively pursued modelling and TV opportunities.

That didn’t seem enough, and so she took to building up her profile by posting videos shot late in the night, shot on her bed or on a sofa in her empty apartment in Karachi..(as she was a grit girl…living and working by herself in that city)). These videos sometimes had her promising a ‘strip tease’ as an act of gratitude if a star cricketer ..namely Shahid Afridi…then captain of the Pakistan team, helped Pakistan win a T20 series match over India! She generally seemed to enjoy being bull headed and politically provocative…challenging the Pakistani Presidents ban on celebrating Valentine’s Day with a similarly mocking selfie video.

Sadly, though her dreams of fame and wealth did materialise, and she virtually funded her family weddings, paid her parents rent, she had her worst enemy right at home. Her own brother Waseem. The boy cut off all his socialising because his friends were busy leering at his sisters uploads and mocking Waseem and his family.

By and by Waseem murdered his sister. And this is just the beginning of the story. I am reading Sanam Meyer’s book, titled THE SENSATIONAL LIVES AND DEATH OF QANDEEL BALOCH. Watch this space!

WHILE OUR INHERENT TENDENCY IS TO GET COMFORTABLE IN A JOB WHICH MEETS OUR DESIRE FOR SECURITY THIS INSIGHTFUL BOOK TELLS WOMEN TO STEP BACK AND SEE THE BIG PICTURE..AND ALWAYS ASK. WHAT NEXT? SANGEETA WADDHWANI PRESENTS A REALITY CHECK

Had a fascinating morning at the Dosti Room – a space for Indo-American friendship, this morning at the US Consulate in Mumbai. The topic on discussion revolved around what tendencies keep women down or at least keep them exactly where they are, when they could be spinning to the top. The book being discussed was by the bestselling author of WHAT GOT YOU HERE WONT GET YOU THERE. “That first book was mostly talking to men…more specifically CEOs,” shared author Marshall Goldsmith. “A mutual friend of me and Sally..(Sally is his primary co-writer), suggested we do this second book, to help women go up the ladder!

As he spoke, he slowly unravelled the patterns that uniquely and usually see professional women stay behind…”They get emotionally so attached to their job, they don’t realise they sacrifice their career potential sticking to the job.” One thinks about that…Yes so often one does let a sense of emotional and team comfort supercede one’s true and vaulting ambition. Like, 11 years at HELLO! and I never bothered with an online platform like this, which I now find does great justice to the daily encounters I am having. A blog frees one from mainstream constraints, and hopefully becomes a daily chat that people enjoy!

Second, he quoted a Buddhist idea that “with every breath, you can be a renewed you.” And so one by one, he pointed out typical female habits… 2. Always putting others..their views and opinions first, 3. Always thinking of micro-managing the day to day without planning for the future…”I would say do 95 per cent, and leave 5 percent of your time for what you dream of…”…and so on. For each tendency, he would say take a deep breath, and just shake it off with a hand gesturing a ‘go away!’

The fact of the matter is, so much MORE is generally dumped on women in the workplace, because they willingly take it on. They dont know or seek how to say ‘No.’ “Also, women are shy about aggressive self-promotion,” he continued, and yes I could see how Domestic Managers become Doormats Without Perks in so many homes.

But I also felt Indian women – at least the generation of my contemporaries – were not so self-effacing or angelic. I have had colleagues who in their 20s, were quite capable of being manipulative, were blatantly consumer-driven…and one had even dumped her live-in partner’s suitcase out her door and asked him to leave, as he did not want to commit!

So somewhere I found the ideas more suited to women of the pre Baby Boomer generation. However I am yet to sink into the lovely signed copy I have…so here goes!

But a fun moment I had was meeting advertising guru Prahlad Kakkar over breakfast break…I had forgotten to courier my book ENCOUNTERS WITH THE RICH AND FAMOUS to him…and shared with him the few hotspots I had got into, simply being honest about some of the unusual choices that the Rich and Famous often make, to which he said “But that’s GREAT! You must do honest writing! It’s good to get sued! Stand up for something…or you will fall for everything!”

He was so wonderfully dramatic, That I asked him to express himself on a video. Here it is! Enjoy….signing off for the day!

HOW TIMES HAVE CHANGED IN THE ANNALS OF THE WORLD’S LARGEST FILM INDUSTRY! SANGEETA WADDHWANI OFFERS AN INSIDER VIEW

Having met almost ALL our charming movie heros and heroines over the last 15 odd years, and read about the lives and styles of the ones before my career began while I was still a student, I have observed a critical shift between a previous generation (say the stars who ruled the 80s and early 90s) and the new millennium. It is this generation that by far, has it’s feet rooted to the ground. And that…is an UNDERSTATEMENT )

Would a yesteryear superstar ever come clean about her depression and start a body dedicated to helping people combat it, the way Deepika Padukone has? (A Rekha would convert her misery into sher-o-shairees and tell the world to shove off as she is busy being the resident Greta Garbo. Parveen Babi spiralled into total schizophrenia in her total isolation from fans, well wishers and family).

Would a yesteryear female star brave two timezones and work weekends with a perfectionist like Sanjay Leela Bhansali, then fly back to do 14 hour shifts on a TV series, Monday to Friday.. a la Priyanka Chopra? And would a yesteryear hero go religiously to the gym, even if it’s midnight…and hire international coaches to get into his best possible physical and mental shape for a movie? Yes, we’re thinking of the Hrithiks who take forward the legacy of a mentor like Salman Khan. (It might even be fair to say that Salman broke the trend of pot-bellied heroes going straight for beer and chicken tikka after pack up!)

Sure there was something sweet about the more pompous yesteryear stars. Perhaps they could afford their eccentricities, or rather their producers could, given there was no GST tax back then. There were noble stars… actresses like Rakhee who made bhajiyas for Dilip Kumar to consume during the shooting of Shakti. (We believe he liked the bhajiyas so much they were over between his many takes with none left for the final shot!)

There were actresses who made fresh rotis for the unit…nurturing the people around them. Star wives like Jennifer Kapoor and Shobha (for Jeetendra) were most often the stylists for their superstar husbands.

It was a different world…not perfectionist, not globalised and certainly not saturated by social media. One star who clearly embodies the virtues of yesteryear values and today’s acute transparency and professionalism, is Amitabh Bachchan. A compulsive tweeter, blogger, vlogger, FB Live-r, he gyms everyday, respects people’s time, and embraces a changing cinematic and socio-cultural landscape with aplomb. Yesterday a special occassion marked the titan’s 75th birthday.

Sir, you have been paid many compliments but dare I add one more? You embody the best of Old Bollywood and New Bollywood. In you, the twain do meet…

@amitabhbachchan

Pria Kataaria Puri never lets her clients down…had an opportunity to chat with some of them at her recent pop up, and the general consensus was that “You can pack a suitcase in a great big hurry and know that a PKP kaftan or maxi is relatively unfussy and crease free and won’t add kilos to your luggage.” This Spring/Summer show which concluded the Avenue 54 SummerFest in Santa Cruz Mumbai, brought new essences out in addition to the refreshing Santorini palette. Pria’s models went through a transformation in her hi-glam evening wear. A Great Gatsby-inspired black and gold line became an unapologetic nod to old Hollywood decadence. She played with organza and translucent capes, turbans, fascinators…layers and sheer caped-gowns, revealing body suits just beneath…it was seduction meeting highly wearable style. Resort gone a bit wild child…Resort gone into Cinderella zone, actually! No Prince would ignore a giraffe wedge left behind by any of THOSE women! Bravo to a highly wearable designer who can be bought and worn immediately off the rack…and whose clothes don’t sit stiffly at size 8…

https://editorspicks.blog/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/20180505_210038.mp4